Apparently I have gained another year. The funny thing is, I really dont feel any older or wiser for it.

I am really too upset right now to say anything.

So I have a very nice stuffed elephant that my friend gave me last year around xmas time as a present. It's fairly large and hard to miss and generally lives on my bed. I was picking him up and noticed that there were blobs of plaster stuck to him which means when they were fixing my ceiling they were negligent in taking care of my things. I left my landlord a message saying as much. This really upsets me.

Purim was interesting. Had alot of fun at my friend M's Seudah....but I am just really too tired to blog...If I do everything will just make less and less sense than it usually does and we all know what that might lead to.. Yeah, I have no idea either. Happy Adar everyone! I hope y'all had a good time.

Happy Hebrew Birthday to me...

McSweeney's Issue 22 is on its way to subscribers and is now available on our site. This issue includes our most contributors ever and our strongest magnets ever.

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COOKIE MONSTER
SEARCHES DEEP WITHIN
HIMSELF AND ASKS: IS ME
REALLY MONSTER?
BY ANDY F. BRYAN

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Me know. Me have problem.

Me love cookies. Me tend to get out of control when me see cookies. Me know it not natural to react so strongly to cookies, but me have weakness. Me know me do wrong. Me know it isn't normal. Me see disapproving looks. Me see stares. Me hurt inside.

When me get back to apartment, after cookie binge, me can't stand looking in mirror—fur matted with chocolate-chip smears and infested with crumbs. Me try but me never able to wash all of them out. Me don't think me is monster. Me just furry blue person who love cookies too much. Me no ask for it. Me just born that way.

Me was thinking and me just don't get it. Why is me a monster? No one else called monster on Sesame Street. Well, no one who isn't really monster. Two-Headed Monster have two heads, so he real monster. Herry Monster strong and look angry, so he probably real monster, too. But is me really monster?

Me thinks me have serious problem. Me thinks me addicted. But since when it acceptable to call addict monster? It affliction. It disease. It burden. But does it make me monster?

How can they be so callous? Me know there something wrong with me, but who in Sesame Street doesn't suffer from mental disease or psychological disorder? They don't call the vampire with math fetish monster, and me pretty sure he undead and drinks blood. No one calls Grover monster, despite frequent delusional episodes and obsessive-compulsive tendencies. And the obnoxious red Grover—oh, what his name?—Elmo! Yes, Elmo live all day in imaginary world and no one call him monster. No, they think he cute. And Big Bird! Don't get me started on Big Bird! He unnaturally gigantic talking canary! How is that not monster? Snuffleupagus not supposed to exist—woolly mammoths extinct. His very existence monstrous. Me least like monster. Me maybe have unhealthy obsession, but me no monster.

No. Me wrong. Me too hard on self. Me no have unhealthy obsession. Me love cookies, but it no hurt anyone. Me just enthusiast. Everyone has something they like most, something they get excited about. Why not me? Me perfectly normal. Me like cookies. So what? Cookies delicious. Cookies do not make one monster. Everyone loves cookies.

Me no monster. Me OK guy. Me OK guy who eat cookies.

Who me kidding? Me know me never actually eat cookies. Me only crumble cookies in mouth, but me no swallow. Me can't swallow. Me no have no esophagus. Me no have no trachea. Me only have black fabric throat. Me not supposed to be able to even talk.

Me no eat cookies.

Me destroy cookies.

Me crush cookies.

Me mutilate cookies.

Me make it so no one get cookies.

Everyone right. Me really is cookie monster.

I don't think my ceiling was really fixed, I think they just painted over everything to make it look fixed because there are still bumps and dents up there where the ceiling swelled or plaster fell down. It kind of sucks that way.

I don't know why I am so tired but I am and tiredness makes me more cranky than I mean to be so if I was cranky or mean to you please forgive me. Hopefully all will be good by this weekend when we will celebrate Purim and spend time with friends and hopefully not have to think about other stuff...

I don't know why I assigned a paper because then I will just have to read them all, but it is due tomorrow and kids are emailing me like mad. Think of leaving things to last minute. I understand though because I do the same thing.

Tired...so tired...and my landlord is not answering my calls. Which makes me unhappy. But otherwise everything else is ok..I guess. :)
I am going to think up a positive for today....

I will get the bad things of today out first:
Monday's are INSANE. I could not sleep last night and had to get up early and the day was crazy. First we found out that one of my student's fathers suddenly passed away. I also turned my hands green with food coloring. Like Kermitt the frog green. I had a long day because I had a meeting after school and didn't really get to say anything at the meeting which is somewhat frustrating because the whole point is to share what's going on with students. After the meeting, I tutored a former student of mine and did a lab with him. Then I went to grocery shop, cooked etc. When I went into my room to get something from my bed and realized that once again there was plaster on my bed.
So this is the state of my ceiling right now...not so fun.
Pretty isn't it?
So good stuff of my day. Despite having 12 kids in my first class and my labs not set up on time the teaching stuff went pretty well! I also grilled awesome chicken for dinner. :) Hey that's a positive right? The other thing is my birthday is the 20th Anniversay of U2's Joshua Tree Album - my favorite.

The Purim thing really was not all that great...actually it was boring. I was all wired up to go do something tonight..so basically I think I am boring myself to sleep right now. I did figure out that on Thursday it is my hebrew birthday which is the 11 th of Adar I believe, which, by the way the calender falls out is also Taanit Esther. I thought that was interesting. I am trying to solidify some plans for the weekend. I have a friend coming in from out of town who is going to come to lunch by us on Saturday but as far as other plans...they are a bit murky right now, but then again it is only Monday. I can not believe March is almost upon us.

This is why I say my Dad is the Jewish Santa...I say it out of love.

I am in my apartment dressed like a freak from the 80s waiting for the pet to come by so we can go to a party. I thought she was coming like a half hour ago but she is jet-lagged so I think she is a little confused. Little does she know I have a little surprise for her costume...

My email has not been working today!!!!

It hurts to stub your toe, it hurts even more to stub your toe in the shower.
My landlord called me today to check on the status of my apartment. Why would anything be wrong? So the ceiling is turning a little bit yellow, so it occasionally smells like gas when we cook because the stove is hard to open so we practically have to yank it out of the wall....so he sent someone right down...

See my brain is balanced...

Your Brain is Green

Of all the brain types, yours has the most balance. You are able to see all sides to most problems and are a good problem solver. You need time to work out your thoughts, but you don't get stuck in bad thinking patterns. You tend to spend a lot of time thinking about the future, philosophy, and relationships (both personal and intellectual).

What Color Is Your Brain?

This weather is a little crazy but it was the first time this morning that I got to walk to work in a very long time. It was a little icy but it was nice and really not that cold. It actually relaxs me before work to walk through the park instead of going on the crowded cross town bus... This is a not so clear picture of Belvedere Castle this morning.

I left work today thinking, wow that was tiring, (well I have a whole lot of classes on wednesdays) but I had alot of fun. How rare is that? I actually enjoy what I do..So I have been wondering why the heck it is accepted as normal that the remaining snow in the city is black? Am I the only one completely freaked out by this? Snow is supposed to be white..not gray, not yellow, and certainly not black!

I was on the 79th Street Crosstown bus around 7:30 this morning and the guy across from me in a very nice business suit etc. was eating chicken with his hands on the bus. I found this a little weird.....

Now that the heat is finally working it is working in that dry slowly dying of thirst sort of way so I put a pan of water to evaporate and I just don't think it is working. Furthermore, my ceiling is blistering even more now which leads me to believe that it is not in fact the plaster drying but the radiator from the apartment above us is still leaking into my ceiling. This worries me a little bit....

I have to say I don't know why I continue to be friends with people who just make me feel stupid. It happened twice this weekend really with two different people. I do not think I am really the type to completely let people walk all over me, I mean clearly I voice my opinions but right now I kind of feel like that. I try to be nice to people and help them out. I try to be a good friend. I try to be loyal and I consider myself a loyal friend but there are some times when it just gets to me and I wonder why can't I be one of those people who doesn't let anything get to them.

Honestly, I am getting sick of being nice. I am getting sick of being labeled the good one and the responsible one when we go out. What good does it do me when people discuss that I am "good people" As far as I remember the good people always finish last.